I had a moment of grossness this morning that people may remember forever. I was positioned among a posse of people lethargically listening to a copy machine man spew a spiel about our new copy machine’s multitude of meaningless marvels. (Sorry, couldn’t resist alliteration.) He asked me to program a fax number into it. I walked up, grabbed the stylus, looked down, and watched as a drip of snot fell out of my nose and landed on the touch screen. I did what any good citizen should do in this instance: I pretended it never happened. Thus far, no one has mentioned the incident.
This whole thing brings me to another point related to said copy machine. There seems to be an army of people that like to eat things like deep-fried cheese curds and mounds of butter and Vaseline – with their bare hands – and then mash all over the touch screen. Seriously people, that’s effing disgusting. Use the stylus. That’s why it’s there.
I acknowledge the possibility that it could all be the work of fingerprint gnomes.
Maybe it’s a personal hang-up, (I have more than my share) but an infraction of a far worse degree occurs whenever someone touches my computer screen. I have an automatic slap reaction when someone’s fingers get too close. Many a coworker has been slapped. My wife has also experienced this knee-jerk reaction (sorry, honey…). The worst ever, though, was an old lady that touched my screen with her freaking ballpoint pen. I wasn’t fast enough to slap. She just freaking wrote on my screen. No respect. Bah. Well, now that monitor belongs to some other schlep.
I’m hangin’ out with Gwen tonight, because the wife has to work late. We’re gonna have a party. She’s been so cool to hang out with lately. She’s just an incredibly silly girl. Her vocabulary is getting to the point where I can understand what she wants and stuff, and it’s just really a joy to hang out and play with her.
Tomorrow is the birthday party blitz. Gwen’s cousin Charlotte turns 1 year old, so we’re going over there after my Criminal Law class. After that party, we’re headed to Wisconsin for Reuben’s middle child’s 2 year birthday party. A bunch of people and their kids will be there, which is awesome. Should be a good time.
2 comments:
I remember, a few years back (ten, now that I think about it) I was in Colorado, head stuffy and drippy with allergies, grilling outside with hot girl who was friends with my then girlfriend. As I dipped my head to look at the chicken on the grill, a big ol' drop of snot fell out of my nose and hit the grill. And sizzled. That probably killed any chance of... well, you know what I mean.
As for computer screens, WORD. Remember the time that girl I kind of liked frosh year spilled ink all over my screen? Yeah, that ended that right quick. LOL.
could all be the work of fingerprint gnomes.
are they a distant relative of the S___ Elves?
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